For me, the beauty of sex, lies in the aftertaste, like chewing green olives, comfortable is the later “wave”, my orgasm elsewhere. Since I was a child, I have the habit of writing a diary, every night before going to bed to clean up what I did during the day, what I saw and heard, is a pleasant and solid thing, as if after the bath in the mirror blowing hair combing, fragrance, warmth, relaxation.
Even the wedding night, I have not changed this habit, my husband laughed at me at the time “waste of good night”, I retorted, it is “romantic night”! The result is predictable, lying on the pillow to write in the diary, I was finally “sex” anxious groom dominated, after dawn, I opened the pink diary, in front of the desk full of sunshine, wrote the first very messy and very colorful “last love story”, about our husband and wife! I wrote the first very messy and colorful “posthumous love story”, about our husband and wife in bed, especially my husband’s “scandalous”, but in fact, I was sweet and trembling in my heart.
It was from this day that I first tasted the moving part of writing a weekly sex journal, as if I had experienced sex again, from the inside to the outside, from the soul began to delight, and then a warm current spread throughout the body.
From then on, I gave myself a beautiful new task, usually every Sunday night to write down the number, quality, and duration of my husband’s patronage that week, as well as our language in bed and each other’s arousal and pleasure levels. Sometimes, I simply write after sex, and this has become part of our couples sex afterplay, and even sometimes my husband also joined in, he “oral”, I pen, very interesting.
This writing, it has persisted for nearly 20 years. My 42nd birthday, it happens to be Sunday, I take advantage of my husband’s business trip is not at home, and re-turn out the old “sex weekly” to see, can not help but smile, this is how a stack of “posthumous love record” heh! It recorded my husband and I love, but also witnessed our growth.
More meaningful is that it allows me to see my own lust changes, as well as her husband’s sexual needs, sexual preferences, the development of trajectory and characteristics.
I was surprised to find that in his 20s, my husband was offensive, attacking and imposing, and at this stage, he was domineering, possessive, and obsessed with pursuing the other person to fulfill his desires.
More than 30 years of age in this time span, the husband’s sexual performance is relatively some negative, the passion of the day to see the flat, which is human nature, but his bedside manners and sexual cultivation has improved, like to complement each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and care about how I feel, often ask me, “are you happy,” this stage, his selfishness is not so heavy, and the two of them interact and communicate with each other, and the two of them have a lot to do. This stage, his selfishness is not so heavy, and he emphasizes the interaction between the two people.
Previously, my “love story” is open to him, so many of my husband’s sex IQ increase thanks to these weekly records, because subtle, he will feel my joy, dissatisfaction and expectations from my words, in the wind and rain, to change some of his bad sex concepts.
Let him understand that the woman’s sexuality is broad, can be generalized to every detail of daily life, and orgasm is a very personal and subjective feelings, thus promoting him for sex and more love, love is sex.
After about 40 years of age, my husband, who had a successful career, seemed to have changed again, and this kind of thing turned out to be in tune with the times! Many times, he just want to hug me, or do some marginal intimate action, as if there is a strong desire to protect, just want to care about you, or pat you to sleep, and even the little nanny of our family also cared for, ask for warmth, which often makes me inexplicably jealous.
Listening to colleagues said, after 40 years of age, men especially like to love some young girls, there is a strong “desire to help”, of course, which also contains ‘love’, so some people will go to the entertainment venues to “save” some of the ladies. “Some ladies …… this night, my husband again and clothes hold me, I hold his chin, aggressively asked: ”Husband, I heard that men in menopause, always want to look for a dry girl care, you have this desire?” I can’t imagine that my husband is surprisingly frank: “To be honest, there really is. However, my sense of responsibility will restrain myself, I do not want to be late, and I do not want to have any bad record in your ‘legacy of love’”.
I liked my husband’s answer; honesty and courage are the most important virtues a middle-aged man needs to shine, and I hugged him tight and touched him with my body heat. But a few days later, I happened to find a ball of handkerchief with semen in the garbage bag. It turned out that my husband masturbated! It was like a bolt from the blue, and I was shocked at how he could be so single-minded and not need me! I was suddenly and inexplicably lost, upset and humiliated.
At that time, I really wanted to grab him right away and tear him apart and eat him. In the end, I used to write the “last note” to calm myself down, and at midnight that day, I took the initiative to turn over what I had written to him, and my husband laughed unnaturally: “You’re great!”
And my question was only 3 words, “Why?” Am I not good enough? Not feminine? Or is it because I’m old? Husband in my questioning, and finally told the truth, the original is my “love story” trouble, he said, every time I write something, there is always a feeling of being stripped pants physical examination, especially after middle age, because in the case of their own sex number and quality of the decline in the case, if the wife is still interested to comment on the demerit points, will produce a sense of inferiority and guilt. A sense of inferiority and a sense of guilt, always feel that they have been male no longer, do not do well enough to meet the desire of Mrs., and this is very tired. Men very often, sex is just to get rid of work pressure or life anxiety, and the wife’s “love story” has obviously become his heavy cross, always affecting his hormone secretion. As for the occasional masturbation within marriage, just figure a moment of pleasure, purely for the sake of sex, in order to vent, do not have to take care of each other’s feelings, as long as the “one person to five people crying” (man masturbation), you can relax yourself, and will not be subjected to criticism by his wife, teasing.
Listened to my husband’s sincere and pitiful inner monologue, my heart is full of compassionate water, but also finally understand why men are tired, know why he would like to care about innocent girls, maybe I’m too old-fashioned, and let him feel that my requirements are too high, not good or not easy to meet, he had to retreat.
Good, between husband and wife can not be no problem exists, because the harmony of the back is never-ending adjustments and compromises, the world is changing, the hearts of people are changing, sexual needs are also changing, “the last love story” was once we are proud of the hypnotic pillow book, and now, perhaps we do not need it, and sometimes, sex this thing, can not really tell too much! I’m not sure if you’re going to be able to get it right, but I’m sure you’re going to be able to get it right, too.
I finally burned the “last love book”, and then buried in my husband’s arms, let him caress, the day that the noble hair bun scattered, in his arms, maybe I just hair mess, heart mess, confused in his arms, let him show me the way, this is my new inner construction, by him to be in charge, to meet the status of his sexual leadership! Actually, I like that too. We are both happy.
